Introduction

One of the goals of our men’s ministry is to help us define what a Christian man is, what his dispositions are, how he thinks and acts and behaves. How he lives his life. The essence of that is found in scripture. It’s lived out before others, we see it in others but its origin is in Christ and his word.

And we find in I and II Timothy letters from Paul to his son in the faith Timothy. So we get great insight into the things that the apostle is stressing to his beloved disciple as how to live out his faith.

1 Timothy 4:6–16 (ESV) — If you put these things before the brothers, you will be a good servant of Christ Jesus, being trained in the words of the faith and of the good doctrine that you have followed. Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness; for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance. For to this end we toil and strive, because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially of those who believe. Command and teach these things. Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity. Until I come, devote yourself to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation, to teaching. Do not neglect the gift you have, which was given you by prophecy when the council of elders laid their hands on you. Practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress. Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching. Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.

We have a rich heritage of godly men in our church. It has been a strength for us since the beginning of our church. And like any blessing that God grants us we never want to assume it will continue just as it’s been in the past. Part of being a godly man is that we continue to grow in our faith and not put our life on cruise control.

Sequoias. We need to take a lesson from the Sequoias. Psalm 92 The righteous flourish like the palm tree and grow like a cedar in Lebanon. 13 They are planted in the house of the Lord; they flourish in the courts of our God.)

You might be tempted to think that guys my age can take it easy spiritually, take their put off the pedal and coast. But if you ask any man here in his 60’s and 70’s they will probably tell you “no I can’t do that”.

None of us can coast because living in this fallen world, for the Christian, is like walking on one of those moving walkways at the airport. Only you’re walking against it. You can get where you want to go but you need to make the effort to do so. In this life the world, the flesh and the devil are always present and seeking to resist our growth in Christ. And if you stop making an effort to walk the walk you will begin to drift backwards.

Philippians 3 gives us a good picture of the life of the Christian (man).

Philippians 3:12–14 (ESV) — Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.

There is an upward call of God on each of our lives and whether you are young or old the call of God is to keep growing as a Christian man. Let’s pray and ask God for help as we look deeper into this calling.

Motivation For Growing

You might ask “Well, why do I need to grow, especially if it requires effort?”. (We all have an inner couch potato). Well our text gives us a sober reason for growth in verse 16: This verse follows Paul exhorting Timothy concerning the importance of growing as a man of God and what’s required to do so. He tells him:

Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.

One commentary defines this word save as “deliver out of danger and into safety; used principally of God rescuing believers from the penalty and power of sin.”

In the first chapter of I Timothy Paul mentions that some have shipwrecked their faith (they have rejected waging the good warfare- they started to coast. Do you want to keep yourself from shipwrecking your life and your faith and those of your family? Then embrace the fact that the Christian life is an active pursuit of the Lord and a continual growth in his grace. Our children (and grandchildren), our young people need us to disciple them in both word and deed.

Our example of continuing to grow as Christian men has a tremendous effect on our spiritual life and on those we are close to (and even those we may not be- but are those who may view our lives even from afar). My testimony? They kept living lives that called me to follow Christ (I was without excuse).

Aren’t you personally encouraged when you see other men genuinely live for God? This may even be in the area of repentance. When you see a Christian brother turn from his sin and turn to God in godly sorrow it brings joy and strength to your soul.

So this is one of the great motivators for godly living = it will save both ourselves and those around us. That’s a high and sobering calling! To live in such a way that others say “I want to be like him”, I want to be like Gary Ruhl, Ron Jones, Bob Walton, or Chip Henderson …

Isn’t it great to see Phil on a Sunday morning go to the prophecy mic. But you don’t have to be old to set an example. In fact in verse 12: we read Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.

Another motivation for Christian growth is the fact that God’s grace will help and empower us to do what he commands us to do. This is good news. We are weak and sinful men. Paul says in 2 Corinthians who is sufficient for these things (rhetorical question). The answer is no one.

The doctrines of grace are wonderful. And one of them says we did not choose Christ, he chose us. And the grace that saves us, sustains us and empowers us to keep growing.

But his amazing grace will help us overcome the resistance of the world, the flesh and the devil.We are all prone to wander and we need God’s enabling power to overcome. And it’s there for us. It should be our regular practice to daily come to God and drink deeply from the eternal fountain of his grace, to come to his throne of grace where we can receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need..

And here, grace can be defined as the undeserved power of God towards us to do whatever God has called us to. We need his grace and the filling of the Spirit daily.

It’s not our own strength (but it does include effort). That’s an important thing to remember.

Growing in Specific Areas

Spiritual Growth is one of our church’s core values. And what I want to talk labout this morning is not only the need to keep growing but to be asking two question. They could be one and the same but I going to frame them as two questions, “Where do I need to and/or want to grow this coming year?” There may be some very obvious areas that you are either weak in or areas where you are not only not growing but sinning in. And you need to repent and grow in godliness in that area.

Maybe you are not leading your family spiritually (abdicating) and it’s causing real issues with your children and wife.

Maybe it’s laziness…

Or maybe it’s in an area like sinful anger or sexual impurity. Areas that if you’re honest you would admit that they are really dominating your life. These are areas that if not repented of can cause you to shipwreck your life and those of your family.

So the first question is where do I need to grow (that is are their glaring issues in my life). But the 2nd question has to do with where do I want to grow? There may also be areas where you have a desire to grow and be more fruitful. When Mickey Conolly, our friend from Charlotte, was here a number of years ago he concluded his message with three helpful responses. Depending on where a person was at they may need to start it up, or step it up, or keep it up. Eg evangelism.

So as I move through the teaching you should be asking yourself and the Holy Spirit (he’s really good about helping us because he know us like no one else does; he searches us, he knows us - he is our helper, our advocate and our counselor ) where do I need and/or desire to grow?

If we are not specific about where we need to grow we will hinder the process. The old adage “aim for nothing and you will be sure to hit it” has some real wisdom for us. Proverbs tells us The discerning sets his face toward wisdom, but the eyes of a fool are on the ends of the earth. A person can want to grow in big ways and do great things for God but unless he sets his heart on wisdom he’ll be frustrated. And wisdom includes having specific areas to grow in. Biblical wisdom is very practical and specific. Read the book of Proverbs, it’s very practical.

How many times have you gone to a conference or heard a teaching or lecture and it really moved you. And you had a genuine desire to grow in that area. But then you went home and never acted upon it. We need to add to our desire to grow the specific areas where we intend to act upon. (and come up with a plan)

To help stir your mind and heart let me give you some categories where we as men need to grow in. And as I do I want you to be asking the question, where do I need or desire to grow this year?

Godliness, that is areas of godly character that you need to grow in. Humility/pride, gentleness and self-control instead of anger. Maybe it’s as simple as the fact that you are habitually late and you need to break that habit.

So maybe you need to grow in the fruit of the Spirit: Areas like love, patience, gentleness, faithfulness. Maybe a lack of these has gotten you into trouble or you are keenly aware that you are deficient in a certain area.

Spiritual Disciplines: There’s a number of spiritual disciplines but the twin towers of the Christian life are the habits of grace of God’s word and prayer.

• Verse 6: speaks about Timothy being trained in the words of the faith and of the good doctrine that you have followed
• The main way the Lord communicates with us is through his word. Yes he also communicates with us through his Spirit and through his people. But the most clear and safe way he speaks to us is through the written word of God.
• One thing that a Christian man is always thinking about is “what does God’s word say about “x”? And the only way for us to know that is to be regularly in Scripture.

Other areas for growth

• Or maybe you need to grow in prayer. Prayer is where the Christian man goes to find strength each day. It’s where we exchange our weakness for God’s strength, our sinfulness for his overcoming grace. It is part of the great exchange. It’s also where we carry those God has given us to care for. We should be carrying our wives, our children, our grandchildren and our church in prayer.
• Marriage - John is going to speak to this in our next’s men’s meeting. But don’t wait.
• Parenting: Are you discipling your children and if so what’s your plan?
• Purity - Yes our generation has been bombarded by internet pornography and that’s a big deal. But sexual sin is not a new area of temptation. The history of the world is filled with men who blew up their lives or discredited their lives by sexual sins (David, Judah, Samson, Solomon,)
• David Powlison Slaying the dragon = pornography and sexual fantasy. Book study.
• Financial
• Evangelism and other areas of ministry.
• Spiritual Gifts
• Leadership - retreat.

How Do We Grow?

By Holy Spirit empowered, grace reliant effort! It’s what Kent Hughes in his book The Disciplines of a Godly Man calls “holy sweat”. It’s not doing things in our own strength but it is the effort we make as we utilize the avenues of God’s grace and power.

Look at our text and some of the descriptions that Paul gives to Timothy:

Rather train yourself for godliness; 8 for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come.

At the end of our passage Paul writes:

practice these things, immerse yourself in them, so that all may see your progress. 16 Keep a close watch on yourself and on the teaching (Watch your life and doctrine closely) NIV Persist in this, for by so doing you will save both yourself and your hearers.

Pickleball eg. We need to make effort. We need an understanding that the Christian life and calling is one of a Spirit reliant robust effort.

We also grow by wisdom and discipline and self-control. But here I’m not talking about self-sufficiency. You might be tempted to think that I’m talking about having a lot of personal will power and if so you know you can’t or won’t be able to keep things up over the long run.

Wisdom calls us to order our lives in a way that helps us live a “self-controlled” life.

In his book, Atomic Habits, James Clear says some helpful things about this area of discipline and self-control. (It may if you are involved in serious sin)

Meaningful change does not require radical change. The more practical way to change who you are is to change what you do. Disciplined people are better at structuring their lives in a way that does not require heroic willpower and self-control.

• James Clear,Atomic Habits

We need to build godly habits (what some call habits of grace) into our lives in ways that we will be able to sustain doing them long term.

Don’t overestimate the one “defining” moment. One moment of inspiration or revelation or spiritual experience. It’s more the little habits done consistently. Success is the product of daily habits… It’s a lifestyle change that we are after even if it takes time to do so.

• James Clear, Atomic Habits

So where do you need to or want to grow and how are you going to get there. What are some small steps that done consistently will help you bear fruit and grow in Christ? What little habits of grace can you build into your life?

Examples:

• Leadership in the home: 5-10 minutes after dinner.
• Meditate 5 minutes a day (driving home). It will change your life.
• Purity: Attend Fred’s book study, ask a mature believer to be your accountability partner, memorize one verse a month in regards to freedom from sin.
• Remember it’s consistency that we are looking for. Little habits of grace done faithfully and consistently will bear fruit in your lives.
• Results have little to do with goals (though they are important) and nearly everything to do with the systems you follow. You have to have a plan as to how you’re going to grow. In closing let me just mention:
• We also grow by help from other men. If your homegroup has a regular men’s get together attend it faithfully.
• If not or in addition to it think about meeting with someone one on one and share your goals and your plans to accomplish them. If you’re a young believer or you need help in a certain area then ask an older brother in the Lord to help you. Or maybe it’s more a mutual care relationship. Either way don’t miss out on meeting with other men.

Wrap Up

The first is write down where you need to grow and/or where you want to grow.

Secondly write down how you are going to accomplish those goals. What small habits are you going to build into your life that will bear fruit.

Third, consider and write down how other men can help you grow.

If you want more time to think about it then write down when you are going to do that and put it in your calendar. Your growing in Christ is your responsibility. No one else can do it for you (others can help especially if you ask them) but you must begin the process.