Being Countercultural Women
1 Peter 3:1–6 – Perspective: 1 Peter – February 27, 2022
Introduction
Reading 1 Peter 3:1–7.
Some of our culture’s messages about women:
- Woman as equal in every way to men—and so anything that hints at the fact a woman might have a different calling than a man is resented.
- Woman as sex object—perfect bodies, little clothing
- Woman as superhero—increasing number of superhero movies where a woman is the heroine.
- Woman as wife and mom—as long as she is also an industry “Influencer” of some kind.
When you see these images and then turn back to the Bible, the Bible can feel like a time capsule.
- Message from another time, another place.
- Surely not written for people like us in such an “advanced” culture—after all, we have streaming tv.
But here’s the key: The Bible is the Message that interprets and judges all other messages. It’s not a “time capsule.” It’s the Timeless Interpreter.
- When it comes to womanhood and manhood and what a godly marriage relationship looks like, we need a Timeless Interpreter.
This week and next we’re stepping into the Counterculture of Christianity.
- Not “subculture,” group w/ distinct attributes/lifestyle at home in culture.
- But “counterculture,” group w/ distinct attributes/lifestyle often COUNTER to the culture, even CONFRONTS the culture.
- Issues of womanhood and manhood, Christianity is countercultural.
The sermon: Three attributes of a “Counter-Cultural Woman.” Next week = men.
Perspective series: 1 Peter gives us God’s unchanging perspective. Today: Womanhood and manhood. Not everything. But important things.
1 Peter = Apostle Peter. Married man. Inspired NT author.
- Passage part of context beginning back in 2:11–12.
- Honorable conduct as we live life in this place of exile.
Sermon: (1) Transformational Submission (3:1–2); (2) Imperishable Beauty (3:3–4); (3) Unfrightened Hope (3:5–6)
Prayer – Ukraine, faithful as men and women, ears to hear
I. Transformational Submission (3:1–2)
“Likewise”… Ties it to earlier passages, especially 2:11–12:
Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul. Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation. (1 Pet 2:11–12)
The basic command: “Wives, be subject to your own husbands.”
- Quick note: “TO YOUR OWN HUSBANDS.” Not, “WOMEN TO MEN.”
- A definition…
- One of the most important Greek lexicons of our day defines it as “to submit to the orders or directives of someone— ‘to obey, to submit to, obedience, submission’” (Louw & Nida, 36.18).
- 38x NT: Jesus to his parents (Luke 2:51), Christians to governments (Rom. 13:1, 5), all things to Christ (1 Cor. 15:27), wives to their husbands (Eph. 5:22, 24; Col 3:18; Titus 2:5), Christians to “rulers” and “authorities” (Titus 3:1), slaves to masters (1 Peter 2:18), young men to the elders (1 Peter 5:5).
Wayne Grudem:
Be submissive to your husbands means willingly to submit to your husband’s authority or leadership in the marriage.
Wayne Grudem, 1 Peter[1]
The MOTIVATION
- Peter’s motivation in this passage is really important.
- Why do it? Fruitful evangelism!
- This is what I mean by “Transformational Submission.” The people around you are transformed by your godly submission.
- He focuses on her husband: “so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct.”
- True in so many contexts, the power and influence even when not in command.
- Business, politics, military…marriage.
E.g., parents of church father Augustine of Hippo—Bishop in North Africa.
- In his Confessions describes mother Monnica and father Patricius:
She served her husband as her master, and did all she could to win him for You, speaking to him of You by her conduct, by which You made her beautiful….Finally, when her husband was at the end of his earthly span, she gained him for You.
Augustine, Confessions 9.19–22
Submission part of that “CONDUCT” which can win someone to Christ.
- “Pure Conduct” = Sexual purity, moral purity.
- “Respectful” is better as “reverent” (NIV, CSB)
- Greek = “in fear.”
- Not fear of husband but fear of God.
- A fear of God seen in her submission to her husband and her purity
Application: Wrestling vs. Not Wrestling
- Wrestling
- Submission rooted in two things that transcend 1st century culture
- Genesis 1–2 before the fall (Eph 5:31; 1 Cor 11:2–16; Matt 19:3–9)
- Christ and the church (Eph 5:22–33).
- Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth:
Submission was God’s idea…. God’s ways are good. Not only are God’s ways true and right; they are also beautiful and good
Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Adorned[2]
- Another point for the wrestling:
- With issues of abuse or extreme marriage situations.
- The Church and civil authorities.
- Church has the power of rebuke and excommunication.
- Civil authorities can punish and imprison.
- God’s word here assumes these other authorities.
- NOT WRESTLING
- Submission wouldn’t be called submission if you were never asked to…submit
- Preference, Wisdom, Morality (wrong/right, sin)
- If preference: Love is not self-seeking.
- If wisdom: Choose your battles. Remember the place of a humble appeal.
- Remember: It will probably go better than you think. And if not, he bears the responsibility.
- If morality: Remember that submission to a person is never ABSOLUTE. No PERSON gets your TOTAL ALLEGIANCE.
- Only God.
II. Imperishable Beauty (3:3–4)
Read 1 Peter 3:3–4.
These verses aren’t just to the married but to all women.
Peter’s words directly addressed to women but meant to be heard by men! All need to know what TRUE BEAUTY is!
His topic is the “ADORNING” of the woman. Says it’s NOT “external” but internal, “the hidden person of the heart.”
- Examples of external: braided hair, gold jewelry, clothing.
- The specifics aren’t really the point. The specifics change over time.
- He was referring to a kind of braided wear that was extremely elaborate, hard to do, and connected with the wealthy.
- Jewelry then like now can be lavish and inappropriate.
- Clothing can be overdone.
- Peter’s not against taking time with your appearance. He’s against mistaking your appearance for your beauty.
Beauty starts with “the hidden person of the heart.”
E.g., King David as a young man:
But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.” (1 Sam 16:7)
The “heart” Peter is appealing for is marked by “the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit.”
- Easy to read that and think, “A silent pushover.”
- A woman without opinions.
- A woman who lets herself get runover by her husband.
- But twice Jesus is described as being “gentle” (Matt 11:29; 21:5).
- And Matt 5:5, “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.”
It’s easy to read “quiet spirit” and think it just means “quiet.”
- In the 1st century that was seen to be a desirable quality in a woman: “In public they were best seen—nodding in agreement or smiling appreciatively at their husbands’ wit—but not heard” (Keener, 216, citing Shelton, Romans, 299).
- But it’s a “quiet spirit” that Peter’s talking about.
- Can be talkative with a “quiet spirit,” can be quiet person with a toxic spirit.
Finally, Peter reminds us that this beauty “in God’s sight is very precious.”
- Others might not see but GOD SEES!
Wrestling and Not Wrestling
- Wrestling: Don’t you find this freeing? Even incredibly progressive. The idea that a woman’s beauty has to do with her heart and her character and not superficial and ever-changing fads and fashions?
- Courteney Cox, Monica on “Friends”: “There was a time when you go, ‘Oh, I’m changing. I’m looking older.’ And I tried to chase that (youthfulness) for years,” Cox said. “And I didn’t realize that … I’m actually looking really strange with injections and doing stuff to my face that I would never do now.”
- Dolly Parton, “If something is bagging, sagging or dragging, I'll tuck it, suck it or pluck it.”
- Apostle Peter: Might not be all in for her glam, but he’d appreciate her transparency.
NOT WRESTLING: Remember that obedience is very different than legalism.
- Application: Obedience is not legalism.
- Legalism can have two sides to it.
- One = You start adding commandments to the Bible.
- Second = You trust God accepts you because of your obedience.
- A real issue with MODESTY.
Women and men: Time proves Peter’s words to be true.
- A lot of people can be externally attractive.
- But then you get to know them.
- Their true heart comes out.
- Suddenly they’re not so beautiful.
III. Unfrightened Hope (3:5–6)
Read 1 Peter 3:5–6.
Peter’s motivations:
- VV1–2 = Fruitful evangelism of your husbands
- VV3–4 = God’scommendation = “Very precious” “in God’s sight.”
- Now he motivates by holding up the EXAMPLE of women in the OT.
From all those he could have chosen, he picks the most familiar.
- Sarah, Abraham’s wife.
- Peter uses an example from Genesis 18.
- Right after LORD promises a son to Abraham at 99 yrs old
- This is when Sarah calls him “lord”:
So Sarah laughed to herself, saying, “After I am worn out, and my lord is old, shall I have pleasure?” (Gen 18:12)
- That’s why Isaac was named Isaac. It means “he laughs” (Gen 21:3 marginal note).
One thing about this little moment: It’s a private moment. She wasn’t aware that anyone could hear.
- It’s one thing to call him “lord” when others around and you want to make a big show for others.
- But when you don’t think anyone can hear and you still do it, that’s your heart on display.
Her life bore this out:
- Left Ur and went to the land of Canaan
- Twice when Abraham was afraid of what might happen to Sarah and to him, he told Sarah to tell the people around them she was his sister (Gen 20:12; 20:2).
- At some point Sarah would have found out about the LORD testing Abraham, when told to sacrifice Isaac “your only son” (Gen 22).
- Abraham was called in many ways to live a life of faith, trusting in the promises of God—and Sarah “obeyed…calling him lord.”
Peter’s saying you show yourself a child of Sarah if you act like her.
- “If you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening.”
- Means you’re not motivated by fears and anxieties.
- Instead, “do good,” “do not fear anything that is frightening.”
The promises and commandments of Ps 34 are in view here.
- Peter quotes in 1 Peter 3:10–12:
For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” (1 Pet 3:10–12)
Conclusion
Power of pure and reverent conduct? Fruitful evangelism.
Gentle and quiet spirit? “Imperishable beauty,” “in the sight of God…very precious.”
Doing good and walking in faith and not fear? Show yourself a daughter of Sarah and the holy women of the Bible.
Remember Jesus!
- Preeminent “Sojourner and exile” whose conduct was honorable and glorified God.
- So when we want to say, “It’s impossible!” Christ’s example speaks.
- And when we want to say, “I’ve blown it big time. There’s no way back.”
Christ’s example speaks—“Friend, he bore your sins in his body on the tree. You are healed! Be at peace.”
Application: Example of Eunace and Lois in 2 Tim (chps 1 and 3)?
Application for the unmarried.
Prayer
[1] Wayne Grudem, 1 Peter, TNTC (Eerdmans, 1997), 135.
[2] Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth, Adorned: Living Out the Beauty of the Gospel Together (Moody, 2017), 262, 263.
